I Got Rest
I feel like I have been on the go since October. Just non-stop activities.
Before October, I was in a season of easy and quiet. I listened to God and had become a stay at home mom. It was not an easy transition for me. I had been working since I was 16 years old. I was nervous about what to do with my time and how we were going to pay bills.
After a few months God placed on my heart to help other families that needed part time care. This would allow me to still rest, and add to our families income. I started baby sitting part-time at my home during the week. I still felt like I was in my season of rest and contributing to the family finances. It was nice to have the summer to hang out during the week and to watch Karcen grow.
We moved to a new town which was further from the families I was sitting for, which put a pin in my babysitting.
As I was home with Karcen, I felt like I still needed to be doing more. I decided to put in for substitute teaching which turned into a full time TA position in a special education classroom.
Now I am working full-time, Kevin is full-time, Ameena and Rashard are in sports, and Kevin and I are both in school.
A lot was happening around me. A lot is STILL happening around me.
Wife and mom of 4 is not a quiet life.
Now let’s add in the podcast, blog, and group leader to the hat.
Where does it end? My plate began to crack.
I had never experienced the mental exhaustion I began to feel. I’d say it was getting pretty heavy in December. I needed to figure out how to reset my life and organize it.
As I was navigating this new season, I was reminded that I had something to look forward to. My sisters bachelorette party! We were heading to Panama City Beach in Florida.
With this realization there was still a slight panic, how was my family going to function without me?
I began to worry that they were going to make it to work, school, daycare, and eat sustainable meals. Yes, I have a husband, and yes, he is very capable of handling everything. However, because I am the main person to care for everyone, it brought on an anxiety I didn’t even know I had. I had not been away from my family in a very long while. I went a small trip over the summer, but this trip was bigger. I was going to be gone for 6 nights. That is a lot of nights for someone like me.
I prayed. I asked God help calm my nerves (my eye had been twitching).
I asked God to watch over my family. I asked to help me enjoy every moment of my trip.
Philippians 4:6-7 “Pray with thanksgiving and let God know your request.”
I had the BEST time of my life.
I am sitting here on the drive back home and thinking about the fun and relaxation I had while on the trip. I took in all the beauty on the drive down, the beauty while I was there, and the beauty heading home.
My soul was truly blessed with rest. I am thankful for God hearing me and answering me.
My family ate healthy dinners, thanks to my sweet daughter Ameena. Kevin and my oldest David, made sure everyone made it school and daycare each day. I was able to speak with them each night and know they were healthy and safe and okay with me enjoying some girl/me time.
I am thankful for the time and now I know I can handle being away from home.
I learned that I need to take time for myself and to be okay with taking the time.
My head and soul just feel so calm. I went from not knowing which way was up to being ready to take on the world.
I didn’t realize how bad I needed this time away. I didn’t realize that I needed this level of rest.
It is okay to take a minute or days to rest. Take the time. Listen to your body. Pay attention to your mind and actions. Recognize the need for rest. God rested. We are to rest as well.
God’s Love and Mine,
Carrie
