Friendships
Being in any relationship as an adult can be tricky.
(Especially newer relationships.)
Like most of us, I have my girlies that I grew up with, that know me from my highest of highs to the lowest of lows. No filters. No bars held. The good. The bad. The ugly. The glamourous. You know what I am talking about, the friends you can just be so raw with because they know the deepest parts of your life. It’s almost like you are family. (To be honest, all my girlfriends are sisters. My kids call them auntie and their kids are my kids' cousins lol. If you know, you know.) It’s easy to tell them no or be vulnerable and not feel bad about it because you know they understand you and your perspective. But more importantly, you know they will still love you for it.
SOOO... Why do we make it so awkward with new adult friends? Why are we so guarded with new friends when we know the blessings deep friendship can bring?
I think I know why.
Satan does not like numbers. He does not like community. He does not like accountability. He definitely does not like the truth. & What do good, Godly friends provide?
You guessed it – ALL OF THOSE TOOLS.
We tend to take what happened to us in high school with the mean girls as a guide for us to pick friends (I am slapping my forehead on this btw), instead of holding on to God’s word about why we aren’t supposed to be alone and why we are supposed to be vulnerable with friends. & In case you think I am pulling thoughts out of the air, here are some verses to help me out:
Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so does one person sharpen another.”
Proverbs 17:17 “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born in time of adversity.”
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 "Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up."
So, you see, God intended for us to have friends. He wants us to build those communities and have trust with one another. He knows we gain strength in support and numbers. We shouldn’t be afraid to let the ones we love inside our true world. How else can we be held accountable and grow together?
& Trust me, I know it's easier said than done.
I admit I was guarded when we moved and afraid to let people in. It is a bit scary up here, or at least I thought it was. I felt like the people I was meeting had it all together and that my life was embarrassing compared to theirs. But, God STOPPED that thought process and he blessed me with friends. I quickly saw these friends as people who also had tough seasons, shaky moments in the present, and hopeful futures. Although, I have my og girlies, God knew I needed more friends to continue to hold me accountable and help me grow in my new home. Because of that, I am thankful for each person God has blessed me with, even the ones I don’t talk toanymore. They were in my life and impacted it, and I am grateful.
I write all of this to tell you to stop comparing yourself, stop thinking you know what your friends are thinking, and stop allowing the enemy the power of isolation over your life. Be Bold in your walk of Faith and your friendships.
A good tribe builds unstoppable women.
God’s love and mine,
Carrie
